This helps...
About Suicide
The most important thing about suicide is right
here, right now: Get help! If you are feeling like
ending it all and that there is no hope, start with
one of these two actions:

Call 911 or

Go to the hospital's emergency room
(or call a friend to take you there)

But I am scared!

Understandably so; you are not alone (even though it may feel that way). Many
of us have come to the "end of our rope" after having done everything we know
to keep from falling. The same fear that drives you to keep it all together and
solve the problems at hand is the fear that prevents you from acting upon those
thoughts of ending it all. Those are thoughts and feelings.

Here is a fact:

There is nothing, absolutely nothing, that cannot be overcome with help and
support. Once you accept the fact that fear is driving you to present an
appearance of having it all together (even though things are falling apart), you
are one step closer to overcoming distressing thoughts and feelings.

What to Do:

First, don't keep it a secret any longer. The old adage, "secrets make us sick,"
is so true when it comes to having thoughts of ending it all. Let someone in on
your private world. It is critical that you take action now. Just by reading this
you are taking an action to avoid taking your life. Take one more step: make
the call to 911 or a trusted friend (or family member) or go to the emergency
department at the hospital. There, they will help you take the necessary steps
to avoid acting on thoughts of suicide.

Another step is to discuss what you are thinking and feeling with your primary
healthcare provider (physician, nurse practitioner) or a counselor. Once you
discover that feelings come from thoughts and thoughts are transmitted by
chemicals in your brain, a medication could be prescribed to take the edge off
those persistent thoughts. Also, getting connected with a counselor or therapist
is essential to outline a plan of care to help you manage day-to-day difficulties
that contribute to suicidal thinking. Honestly, a combination of medication and
therapy will do wonders!

I Can't Forgive Myself

Let's be honest. People do things for which they are plagued by guilt and
shame. This guilt and shame tends to haunt people in their secret world and
they try their best to cover it up and keep it from being exposed. This
overwhelming guilt and shame sometimes prevents a person from forgiving
himself or herself, forgiving others, and from receiving forgiveness by God and
others.

Steps to Forgiveness


Ask forgiveness from God and accept it even if you do not "feel" forgiven.

Forgive yourself and accept it, again, even if you don't "feel" forgiven.

Accept forgiveness as a fact and each time the guilt & shame emerge,
remind yourself of the fact - even if it takes several times.

Live as though you have been forgiven; don't stay stuck in guilt & shame.


Remember that suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. And in
reality, all problems are temporary!

Considering Suicide?
Click the link below to download a personal safety plan that you may use when
you begin thinking of harming yourself:



Suicide and Depression

Suicide is not an emotion; depression is. Many people who have committed
suicide left evidences that they were battling clinical depression. Some of the
symptoms of depression include:


Sadness most days or a feeling of emptiness

Lack of pleasure or interest in activities or social interaction

Change in weight or appetite (whether increased or decreased)

Changes in sleep (insomnia or sleeping too much)

Feeling restless / on-edge or slowed responses / movement

Loss of energy or feeling tired & drained most every day

Thoughts or feelings of worthlessness or guilt most of the time

Inability to think clearly or difficulties making decisions

Thoughts of ending one's life, suicide, or death


Physical & health problems, disturbing thoughts, and sad feelings may
significantly contribute to thoughts of suicide. Thoughts of suicide are directly
linked to depression.

hi.

i know how you feel about the girl. the closest ive ever come to having a boyfriend is asking him to pass the scissors or something. it sucks. but is there someone else? a girl who seems to always be there for you? a bit of sunshine in your life? i hope you have that.
i have thought about suicide many times. i am too much of a coward to ever try (like you said) to carry it out.
last october my uncle killed himself by gunshot. my family was rocked. no matter how worthless you think you are, if you take yourself away from this world, people that you know will be affected. acquaintances, friends, even teachers or just people you know.
as for the acceptance... i'm an atheist (sorry) so i guess i would have to forgive myself on my own terms. i would have to say that i would hurt others if i took myself away from them, and i cant do that.
and i know what its like to think you're living in your nightmare. trust me. i used music to power through. but a friend helps more than anything. just having someone to listen makes a world of difference.
and if this helps, i believe that you're a good person. don't take yourself away. please.

k. bye.

i read your story and i understand what your going through. but just don't do any thing you would regret in the future. god has a plan for you andit is your job to fulfill it. remember that god is watching over you and he will never leave your side. if you need help or com to a split road and don't know wich way to go, ask god for help. ask god to relieve you from your sins, you will have a clean slate. and also remember there will be other girls, don't let one pass and never think about another.

I feel your pain man, but you need to understand that, while this may sound awful, there are other fish in the sea. You will find another woman to love and now you know to take the opprotunities when they come. Also if you read Rosecat's reply, you would see how suicide affected her whole family. Just think of your family and those who will miss you if you go. Thats the only thing thats stops me from doing it.